Five weeks ago, I transitioned back to Lincoln after 5 months of being in Cumberland with my family and living a beautiful, balanced, nature-filled life. In my previous post, Where is Home for You?, I shared my thoughts and feelings about my transition back. To be honest, it was harder than I expected. I felt pretty lost in my routine. I went back to living alone and having limited human connection, and on top of it, a bizarre situation happened with my apartment, which impacted my health, so the one place I felt safe and comfortable was now jeopardized. In the moment, it felt like everything was piling up at once and I couldn't bare the emotional weight. During this phase, I could feel a strong pull to reconnect to me and my purpose to move through this discomfort and change.
As my dear friend and coach, Kristin, has coached me through, emotions are like the ocean waves; we experience high and low tides throughout different seasons, weeks, months, and even within the same day. Sometimes, we get pulled into the whirlpool, feeling trapped and stuck, with no way out. During these emotional peaks and valleys, I have come to realize that to fully live and experience all that is life, we must ride these waves with patience, grace, and compassion, knowing that these waves too shall pass. Over time, we learn what our unique life vests and boats are (activities, practices, rituals, people, etc. ) that help us to ride through these waves, fully aware that just on the other side the sun is shinning over the calm water, allowing us to breathe and keep swimming.
Last week we transitioned into a new season: the Autumn Equinox. The fall calls us to create space.
Space to let go and let in.
Space to listen, pause, and reflect.
Space to rebalance, rejuvenate, and recharge.
Space to shed to allow for new growth and expansion.
Space to give thanks and gratitude for the good in our lives.
Space to celebrate what was, what is, and what is yet to come along this journey.
This season is calling me back home to myself. To stay grounded in who I am. To keep an open heart. To listen to what my soul is telling me. To speak from my authentic voice.
Back in August, Emma and had a feeling that the transition into this next season was going to be both beautiful and challenging and would be calling for both balance and perseverance as I moved back to Lincoln and she dove into work projects and dedicated more time and energy to her art and floral business. To support our future selves, we booked a long weekend in an off-the-grid yurt in Colorado. We wanted this weekend to be a space where we could completely unplug in order to reflect, reconnect to self, rejuvenate, and recharge... and wow, our past selves were spot on.
Going into the weekend, we both desired for these 5 days to be a chance to be present, to embrace each moment with little to no expectations and to flow with each day with an open heart and mind. On the drive out, we listened to two of Brené Brown's podcast episodes: "On My Mind: RBG, Surge Capacity, and Play as an Energy Source" and "The Body is Not an Apology with Sonya Renee Taylor" (HIGHLY recommend both episodes). These episodes provided us with a foundational message that helped to prepare our souls as we embarked on this adventure: "In order to keep moving forward, we must create time and space for the self to recharge; time for play. Play is time spent without a purpose, allowing us to tap into our inner selves, our creative souls, to express something real and beautiful. We must go inward before we can make a difference outward and it all starts with self-love."
When we stepped into the yurt, we immediately noticed the hummingbird painting and knew we were in the perfect place:
"The hummingbird signifies positivity and is spiritually resourceful. Inside the tiny hummingbird resides an endless well of energy and positivity. It has learned where to gather nectar and returns to these sources for nourishment and rejuvenation. These sources usually involve nature, creativity, and exploring spirituality. Every droplet of life becomes sweet, every moment worth savoring."
When we pause and truly listen with an open, present heart, we start to see and feel what the world is trying to tell us. Throughout the trip, mother nature was sending us some powerful messages:
The family of rabbits that live under the yurt, greeting us each morning, reminding us to not allow fear to limit the life we want to create. Listening to the moth as it circled our heads during morning journaling, reminding us that life is complex and we must see it as an infinite mystery rather than wishing it was easier or different. Embracing the gracefulness of the horses on property as they showed us the power of being free and tapping into our expansive energy to provide us with momentum forward. Feeling the winds shifting from the hawk flying overhead on our way to Horsetooth. Hearing the buzz of the bee while watching out for its painful sting as we paused to take in the beauty of our hike, affirming the importance of mini-vacations. Taking in the magnificent Elk presence in the Rocky Mountain National State Park, allowing their stable, resilient energy to wash over us, motivating us to stay strong amidst life's many changes. Catching a glimpse of the owl under the moon light after an energizing, beautiful day, holding onto its wisdom and trusting the abundance that will follow. Pausing to witness the beauty of the powerful mountain peaks, looking within to find our unique gems to stand grounded in our truth.
This trip reminded me that our souls are calling for attention, for quiet, for reconnection to self and our own energy source. Taking time for ourselves- our hearts, our minds, and our bodies- is essential to recharge and refuel so can we sustain our momentum towards creating what happens next, on both an individual and collective level. This experience highlighted the importance of play; to live each moment as you are, to embrace life as it is, without a plan or purpose, and to do so with a little bit of otter energy: "unobstructed joy, giddiness for life, full of love, needs nothing". When we do this, we experience moments of inspiration and we start to notice the extraordinary in the ordinary moments.
On the way back from most vacations, I start to feel the pit in my stomach that something magical is coming to an end and the anxiety of what is waiting in my inbox or what I missed on social media starts to pull at my heart. I wanted coming back from this trip to be different. During the car ride back, I reflected on the experiences we had and what I learned and discovered. As I have reflected, I came to realize that I want to live in between a place of gratitude for what the experience provided and what it can continue to give to my life moving forward. From this trip, I will take with me the value of pausing to regain strength. I will create more time and space to return to my sources of nectar to fuel my everyday routine. I will write more. I will give myself permission to disconnect. I will remember that I am my own life vest during the the high tide. I will continue to put my time and energy into what gives my life meaning and purpose. I will share my gifts with the world to help guide my path forward. I will continue to become more myself.
"My daily prayer: that I become the very best version of myself. That I shine more brightly by the day. That I operate not at half dim, but at full wattage. For as long as I am a live, I will be growing and improving; wielding my pen as the author of my forever. I want to know who I am and accept every part of that identity. I am uncertain and I am confident. And by learning to embrace the paradox in all of it, I am more myself."- Alicia Keys, More Myself
Thank you to our past selves for knowing that this experience is exactly what we needed in this moment in time. Thank you to mother nature for sharing her gifts with us. Thank you to Emma for embracing this adventure with an open heart with me. Thank you to the magical yurt and our wonderful host who created this oasis for us to reconnect, rejuvenate, and recharge.
What do you need to shed to allow for growth?
Where/what are your sources for daily nourishment and rejuvenation?
How can you create more time for play in your life?
Oh, Sam. You are such a gifted writer and wise woman. Thank you for sharing your gifts. I’m grateful that you’re in my life and in Emma’s. 💕
Thank you all for your lovely, heartfelt comments. Love you xoxo
“Ride the waves with patience, grace and compassion, knowing these waves shall too pass”...Love this!! So pleased you were able to take this trip (and with your bestie Emma) to help you reconnect and rejuvenate! ❤️.
Awesome! What a great trip. I feel this sometimes when I go up north hunting. This is my yurt.
Pretty awesome Sam (and Emma)! A trip you will never forget, I'm sure. My October card is the Hummingbird and my September was the Rabbit- which I didn't really care for! Lol. Love you to pieces! Thanks for sharing your gifts with us all! XOXO