Navigating Uncertainty: Breathe In The Beauty

"We can't control what is happening, but we can keep choosing kindness."

On Wednesday, March 11th, I celebrated my 29th birthday. For those who know me, I LOVE birthdays; what a beautiful excuse to celebrate those you love. That Wednesday evening, I celebrated with a few close friends in Lincoln , practicing yoga at Lotus House of Yoga, followed by drinks at the Mill and of course ice cream from 402 Creamery, three of my favorite Lincoln spots. It was a lovely evening filled with laughter, joy, and meaningful conversations.

Thursday morning started as a regular work day, a little quiet, but I was excited to be going home that evening to continue to celebrate my birthday with family and friends at our home in Cumberland, WI for the weekend. Two hours before I left for the airport, we got the COVID-19 email: the University of Nebraska-Lincoln (UNL) has cancelled classes the following week and will be moving to remote learning starting Monday, March 30th, after spring break. It all happened so fast. My responsibility "mom mode" kicked in and in a frenzied scramble, I started to draft emails to our students and called a staff team meeting to talk through next steps, step 1 being: breathe. I lead with high empathy, meaning, I feel the emotional energy of others very deeply, as if they were my own emotions. As I spoke to our students and my team, I could feel a blanket of emotions surrounding us: confusion, sadness, longing, and fear; it was the ending of a chapter for all that came way too soon.

At this point, I had already packed my bag for the weekend, at the last minute grabbing my work laptop, not sure when I would be coming back. I remember sitting on the plane- after wiping down my seat with Clorox wipes- thinking I might not be coming back to Lincoln for a while, and at that point, I had a feeling life was going to change quite a bit. That weekend at home was beautiful, a house filled with amazing humans sharing love, laughter, and fun. By Monday morning, March 16th, and the week to follow, social distancing became more real, MN called for city lock down, followed by WI, which now mandates gatherings outside of immediate family no more than two people, and later that week, UNL moved to remote working for all non-essential employees starting Monday, March 23rd. One second, everything was normal and the next, life around the world was turned upside down. How quickly everything changed.

---

Shifting Perspective

During a time of uncertainty and perhaps feeling a bit out of control, shifting our perspective to understanding what can we control and channeling a grateful heart can help to overcome feelings of pain and suffering and move us forward.

As a result of social distancing, isolation, and quarantining, loneliness, anxiety, and depression can increase. During this time, I am practicing looking inward to identify and connect to where I am at- emotionally and mentally- so I can control my perspective and behaviors to be able to best connect with myself and in return, with those I love.

Journaling prompts to shift perspective and connect with self:

1. What am I grateful for?

• Being safe and healthy in a loving, comfortable, cozy home with my family.

• My two roommates who love to cook, laugh, go for walks, play games, try new things, and celebrate what is good in life.

• Technology so I can connect with family and friends.

• Having a job, providing me with daily purpose and financial security.

• My positivity, which is yearning to spread joy to others.

2. What is in my control at this moment?

• Managing my anxiety with yoga, moments of stillness, reading, breathing and setting realistic expectations so I can go into my first full week of teaching remote with a positive, productive mindset.

3. What is a growth practice I want to try?

• I want to ensure I continue my yoga practice as apart of my new routine. This means, scheduling breaks, putting it on my calendar and staying accountable to myself.

4. What brings me joy?

• Quiet time and space to reflect and write; bringing joy to others; taking a walk outside in the sunshine.

5. Which activities energize me?

• Writing, connecting with loved ones, coaching, blogging, yoga.

6. What is a creative project I want to start?

• I want to spend time creating my personal brand.

Positive- thinking conversation prompts (for when you need a break from COVID-19):

1. Where are you at? (mentally, emotionally)

2. What personal projects are you working now?

3. What's the best compliment you have ever received?

4. What new books have you been reading?

5. What is bringing you joy today?

6. What is your outlet for fun?

7. How can I support you?

"Staying positive doesn't mean you have to be happy all the time, it means that even on hard days you know there are better ones coming."

---

Creating a New Routine

In my previous blog post, Living Life on Purpose: A Year of Evolving, I describe my personal journey of rediscovering myself and creating a healthy routine that worked for me to feel energized and purposeful in my daily life. Like most of you, my daily routine has drastically changed and every area of my well-being is currently being challenged, forcing me to rethink what each of these look like in my life.

As outlined in my previous blog post, Gallup's 5 elements of well-being are defined as:

1. Purpose Well-being: Do you like what you do every day? When you are thriving in purpose well-being, you will have something to look forward to every day and twice the odds of thriving in your life overall.

2. Social Well-being: Do you have strong relationships and love in your life? Your social Well-being is strongly influenced by your closest relationships and social connections.

3. Community Well-being: Do you take pride in your community? The positive outcomes of thriving community well-being might be the difference between having a good life and a great one.

4. Financial Well-being: Do you have enough money to do the things you want to do in life? Financial security has much more influence on your overall well-being than your income alone.

5. Physical Well-being: Do you have good health and enough energy to do what you want to do every day? With thriving Physical Well-being, you will look better, feel better and live longer (Gallup, 2019).

With this change, I have had to re-assess the meaning of each element to be able to pivot and alter my behaviors to align with my current environment. For me, having high purpose well-being is a driving force that impacts my other areas of well-being. Below are some activities I am trying to continue to strengthen each area of well-being.

Ways to live out your well-being:

Purpose well-being:

• Journaling prompts: What brings me joy? What energizes me? What motivates me? What does my purpose look like right now? What shifts in my routine can I make to strengthen my purpose?

• Complete the CliftonStrengths Assessment to identify your top areas of talent and what gives you energy-*message me for a $10 code!

• Start a project you have been pushing off.

• Identify your love language: How do I give and receive love? How do I give love to myself? For me, I give love through words of affirmation and receive through quality time and meaningful conversations. To feed these love languages this week, I wrote and mailed handwritten letters and scheduled virtual hangout with my family and friends. Complete the Love Languages free online assessment to learn your love language. Once you know your love language, read "How to Care for Yourself Based on Your Love Language" for the best self-care tips for you.

Social well-being:

• Schedule virtual hangouts with friends and family using FaceTime, Facebook messenger, Zoom or Google Hangouts. This could include book clubs, workout sessions, game nights, dance parties, happy hour, or casual conversations. If you want to connect with someone, don't over think it, reach out!

• Download the Marco Polo app stay in touch with video messages.

• Write and mail handwritten letters.

Community well-being:

• Listen to Brené Brown's new podcast: Unlocking Us:Conversations that unlock the deeply human part of who we are, so that we can live, love, parent, and lead with more courage and heart.

• Recognize and celebrate all that you are currently doing to support your community! Community could mean family, friends, pets, neighborhood, city, country.

• Identify how you can continue to support your community. This morning is the first day of teaching and learning remote for UNL faculty and students. To help create a successful transition, our team recorded a fun video to send out to our students to remind them that they are not alone.

Financial well-being:

• Automatic transfers into investment or savings accounts.

• Track how much you are saving during this time.

• Create a budget and track investments. Helpful apps: Mint, Clarity Money, and Robinhood.

Physical well-being:

• Find a workout/exercise routine that works for YOU and your new schedule.

• Yoga with Adriene

• The 7-minute workout

• Daily burn workouts

Working from home and balancing your well-being:

• Create a work space that allows you to feel productive. I turned a tall wardrobe box into a standing desk and I placed it by the window so I can enjoy the sunshine.

• Schedule and TAKE breaks throughout the work day; stretch your legs and go for short walks to keep your energy up. My friend Emma and I schedule a 30-minute Zoom yoga flow session over the lunch hour each day to connect and keep each other accountable.

• Turn on your video during conference calls. Studies have shown that this can create connections and decease feelings of isolation and loneliness.

• Article: How to Keep Remote Worker Wellbeing High

• Webinar: Well-Being While Working from Home- Ikigai Labs

• Podcast: Ensuring Your Wellbeing Doesn't Suffer When Working Remotely

---

As a culture, we often stress that we do not have enough time to do all of the things we want to do or feel we "should" be doing. So I ask, now that you have this time, what do you want to do with it? How will you spend it?

"The hummingbird's secret is that it has learned where to gather nectar, and it returns to these sources daily for nourishment and rejuvenation. This springs from many sources, but usually involves nature, creativity, and exploring spirituality. Every droplet of life becomes sweet, every moment worth savoring."

1. What are my vital resources? What recharges me?

2. In what areas do I want to grow?

3. How can I shift from "doing" to "being" during this time?

4. What skills can I build on?

5. What is this moment in time teaching me?

6. Who are my people? Who do I check-in on?

7. What calms me?

8. How can I prioritize fun?

9. How can I make today beautiful?

---

On and off I have felt pings of anxiety; a tug at my heart feeling the emotions of humans around the world. However, as I have connected more deeply with family and friends through all of this, I have also felt feelings of hope. On her first episode of her new podcast, Unlocking Us, Brené Brown helps us to navigate the emotions coming up as a result of COVID-19 using the FFT process: The Effing First Time. Below is a paraphrase of this process from this episode.

1. Normalize it: In the midst of what is going on, we don’t know how to do this. This being social distancing and staying sane, staying socially connected by staying far apart, working while also home schooling, working remote, or handling losing a job; we have never experienced this before, it’s all new, therefore, we don’t have past experiences to rely on, to learn from. You may be feeling anxious, uncertain, confused, sacred, and hopeful; some of us may be grieving the life we once had, the trips we had to cancel, time with loved ones, a stable paycheck, our wedding, graduation ceremonies. In all of this, there is no "right" way to feel. It is uncertain and scary, but we have to hold onto hope with a grateful heart and remember that we are doing the best we can.

2. Perspective: We don’t know when this will end, but we know it’s not forever. Since we haven’t experienced something like this before, we need to be patient with ourselves and others. When we experience something for the first time, fear usually takes over and dictates our thoughts and behaviors. Identifying when fear is creeping in helps us to pause and take back our emotional power to move forward. Recognizing and sharing where we are at- emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually- asking for help, and listening to one another allows us to build connection and hope. We are all we have.

3. Expectations: Set realistic expectations for yourself and those around you. We also need to set expectations regarding the information we read and be sure it is from reliable sources. Ask yourself: What are my expectations of myself? Of those I work with? Of those I love? Are these expectations realistic? Can I let go of some control and replace it with patience and curiosity?

This pandemic is challenging us to identify what is most valuable to us, encouraging us to reconnect to our purpose and what gives us life. It is also connecting us as human beings, revealing the power of kindness, which will allow us to create a path forward to brighter days. We are all in this together and right now, the world needs us and our gifts more than ever.

"Let us breathe in quiet and exhale fear... breathe in health and exhale anxiety... breathe in connection and exhale isolation.. breathe in stillness and exhale self-doubt...

let us breathe in the beauty as one."

---

"Embrace uncertainty. Some of the most beautiful chapters in our lives won't have title until much later."

1. Where are you at?

2. What is beautiful about today?

3. What is this moment in time teaching you?

4. Which area of well-being is being challenged? Which area is strengthening?

5. What's next?